Fear of losing or pressure to win

Bala K Asked 6 years ago

First of all thank you for your great work.  Two of our sons are play table tennis. The elder one has been learning since 5 and now he is 11. The younger one is 7 and has been learning for two years. 

My elder son completely changes when he enters the play arena. He starts thinking that he needs to win and there is a fear of losing. His strokes become tentative and after a point he gives up. He does not seem to execute all his skills.

Can you guide me on this? At times he has been waning to give up TT. I am feeling bad and confused about the situation.

Alois Rosario Answered 6 years ago

Hi Bala,

This is a common thing with players.

I guess the first thing is to examine why he is fearful.  Is it a fear of losing or worried about trying to please others or that his expectations from himself or from others is too high.  Sounds like he has lost the enjoyment of just playing the game.

I think if you can talk to him about these things or get someone that he listens to to talk to him about this then that will be a good step forward.

Then during the game he needs to work on staying as calm as possible and think about each point individually.  Perhaps try to establish a pre point routine that he can follow.

Most of all though I think it is to get him to just enjoy playing.  Not an easy thing to do but worth the effort.

The other thing is to take a look through the Sports Psychology section of the site which will also give you some interesting ideas.